It started the day they released us from Camp. I swear down, the person that invented white and white will never know peace. I had just wasted 2 weeks of my life living behind walls and being chased around by a bunch of good for nothing soldiers. Even in secondary school I never had to frog jump! A big shior to them all. Anyway, that was all over and we’d been released into the wild, I was determined to cruise the rest of the year to the max. I can’t shout, there was no way I was going to endure one full year in some water logged creek at the backyard of nowhere so I’d fought tooth and nail to get myself posted to town and it had worked. As the only girl in the family Daddy and my brothers had showered me with wads of cash before I left home, so when we got to town I refused to join the mere mortals squashed together in the Corpers’ Lodge and decided to get a cab and find a hotel instead. And on that one decision lie all my troubles of today.
I don’t know what possessed me to take that particular cab, but as soon as I settled in I knew the driver was just pure evil. After gleefully driving through every single pothole he could find he practically threw me and my bags out in front of the hotel as soon as I’d paid him. Even after I’d deigned to give him my sexiest smile he refused to help me take the bags in and so I gathered them together and sat down to go through my phone and find a mugu to come from the Lodge and help me out.
Now, at this point I need to say that another set of people to blame for today’s troubles are the mugus. What do we have them for if they cannot be trusted to come running when we need them? The first mugu didn’t answer his phone, the second mugu’s phone was off and the third mugu told me in a whisper that he couldn’t take the call now and would call me back in an hour. In an hour! What did the camel expect me to sit here and do for a full hour? And just as I was building up a head full of fury and looking for who to vent it on I heard a voice behind me say “excuse me, sister corper”.
A toaster again in this hot sun? Father God, what had I done to deserve all this? I didn’t answer immediately, I gave him enough time to recognize the folly of this venture and quietly go away, but it seemed he couldn’t sense danger right under his nose. “Emm, excuse me, sister” he said again and tapped me. I gathered all the venom I had stored up for the driver and for the three mugus and for ineffective mugus the world over and swung round to give him an unadulterated piece of mind when I saw a sight that stopped me short… Mother of God! But this was the most handsome smile I had ever seen in my life! And I’m not lying, the sun chose that moment to go behind a cloud and the breeze began to blow and somewhere in the back of my mind I thought heaven must somehow be made up of white teeth and dark skin.
Now, something you need to know about me. I’m a sucker for a handsome smile. I lost my virginity at 16 to a married man because of a handsome smile. And then this one here even had a faint moustache to go with it, dear Lord! All mugus were forgotten as I smiled back stupidly. I’d probably sewn my wedding gown and started planning the guest list in my head when he excused himself yet again and asked if I needed help or if the person I had called was coming. “Who? Me? Called? No, oh! I didn’t call anyone, oh!” I answered and I told him I definitely still needed help. So he carried my bags into the lobby and waited while I registered, and since there wasn’t a single bell boy to be found he also helped me carry them up the stairs. At the head of the stairs he dropped the bags and said he hoped I could manage from here on seeing as he was a stranger and I probably didn’t want him knowing my room for security reasons. Yes, yes, I know, that was all very wise but my dear, opportunity knocks but once. And this opportunity in the white t-shirt and blue jeans wasn’t going anywhere as long as I had a say in the matter. So I introduced myself and in return he told me his name was Preye. I smiled that same smile that failed to work on the useless driver and told the handsome Preye that we were now no longer strangers so the problem was solved. He smiled this strangely shy, boyish smile, murmured something that sounded like OK and carried my stuff down the corridor and into my room. I know it was all quite dangerous but you have to admit, that’s usually part of the thrill!
*Looking at my watch* See, eh, like I said at the start, I’m in serious trouble here and I need to see someone immediately. I’ll continue the story tomorrow, no vex.
Ladies and gents, I’m really sorry for telling this story in bits, but no matter how hard I tried this one just refused to fit into my thousand word limit. Happily, the concluding part is now up! Check it out here. Enjoy! Oh, yes, and can someone please help me translate mugu and shior for anyone who doesn’t understand? I tried but for once words fail me!