How My Life Ended


Woman-In-DespairI started gisting you my story yesterday and had to go quite unceremoniously, I’m sorry.  You can catch the first part here if you missed it, and I’ll continue today…

So, from his shyness and general awkwardness I could tell Preye was young, my age maybe, and he probably had limited experience with the fairer sex.  But that was ok, in 21 years I’d gathered up enough experience to go round.  I begged him to hang around for a bit while I freshened up so he could show me around town and then I dashed into the bathroom and scrubbed as quickly as I could.  I towelled off, put on some make up and perfume and then stepped out as nude as the day I was born. Yup, I got the reaction I wanted – bulging eyes, jaw on the floor and Adam’s apple bobbing up and down on fast forward. If I wasn’t terribly horny I’d have found it all quite hilarious but today I was on a konji clearing mission – I’d been three long months without a man and that streak had to end today.  It’s not like there hadn’t been any fine boys on camp, but please I’m not a dog, I can’t be ‘doing’ outside under the moonlight.  Anyway, this day I slowly walked towards him, pulled him to his feet and… Well, this isn’t a porn story so I’ll leave you to imagine the rest.  If u need any help with the imaginings please ask nicely and I can recommend a couple of websites.  I’ll just say Preye was porn star material!  After what must have been more than 2 hours my konji was a distant memory and I was a satisfied woman under a not even near exhausted man.  This was the life!  I’d originally planned this as a one night stand but I changed my mind and we exchanged numbers.  He would be a handy asset in this strange land.

Next day I reported to the secondary school I was posted to and spoke to the vice principal.  Since the teacher I was to replace hadn’t gone on maternity leave yet I was accepted and asked to return in two months.  I returned to the hotel, packed my things and sent Priye a text telling him I was going back to Calabar and asking him to keep in touch.  And that he did.  That he did.

My dear, Preye hounded me day and night!  He called, he texted, he sent me voice notes.  He said he had fallen in love and couldn’t live without me and by the third week I was tearing out my hair and beginning to wonder if this hounding wasn’t too high a price to pay for good sex.  By the fourth week I was set to call him and tell him I was dying or something, anything just to get him off my back, when it occurred to me that my period was a few days late.  As all we ladies do, I repented of all my sins for the next week and beseeched God to send ‘my flower’ back to me but He was having none of that.  I told myself it must have been the stress of camp causing the delay and gave it another week to show but it didn’t.  So I did a test and as the witches would have it, I found out I was definitely pregnant.

Mehn, I couldn’t let that happen, I couldn’t let my dad find out!  The man had this crazy notion that I was his sweet virginal baby and feeding that fantasy had paid me big time in the past.  I couldn’t let it end now.  So I gathered some money together and rushed off to see my doctor.  I’d started seeing this one when some quack gynaecologist had botched my third abortion while I was at university.  After he’d fixed me up the new doc had given me two warnings, (1) because of the scarring to my uterus I might have difficulties conceiving and keeping a pregnancy naturally and (2) I should avoid another abortion on pain of a hysterectomy or even possible death.

I mean, like anyone else would, I reasoned at the time that if I couldn’t get pregnant I wouldn’t need an abortion, abi?  But apparently this new doctor was another quack and I was now 4 weeks pregnant.  Anyway, I went to his clinic and told him my predicament and that I needed the nuisance taken out immediately.  He looked at me like I had grown an extra head and said he simply wouldn’t do it.  Then he sat me down and explained all the dangers of an abortion in my condition and the great miracle that had occurred with this pregnancy.  He encouraged me to talk to the man in question and see about keeping the child as this might be the only chance I’d ever get.  Well, he had a point.  And the man in question was easy on the eye and going by all his calls and texts he probably liked me enough to marry me so I decided to have a word with him.

I called Preye and listened to him go from anger at my not telling him about it earlier to relief that I’d gone for a termination and then blind panic when I said I hadn’t been able to go through with it.  I finally managed to calm him down and convince him it wasn’t the end of the world yet.  I asked him to have a word with his people and then call me back later and after two anxious days he finally called back to say he’d spoken to his parents and when they’d heard the whole story they had just calmly asked to see me when I got back to the town.  That wasn’t so bad, then!  I decided to keep it under wraps for now and then bring him back home to Daddy as my boyfriend/fiancée after I had seen his parents, and with that happy thought I skipped on home and got ready for my return trip.

I arrived late on Sunday night and I must have been extremely tired because I overslept on Monday morning and was late for my first day of school.  I hurriedly dressed and hopped on an okada who spent the entire journey crawling behind a tipper.  I swear, if I had come down and jogged I’d have gotten there sooner.  When I finally got to the school about 10 minutes late I ran down to the admin block to report myself to the principal who I hadn’t yet seen, but the secretary told me he was already conducting the morning assembly in the hall.  Off I ran again down the corridor one hand clutching my bag and books, and the other trying to yank down my short skirt that was intent on embarrassing me this morning.  As the witches would have it I tripped on my left foot just as I was approaching the assembly hall door and thus stumbled noisily into the formerly quiet morning prayers.  And it was there on my hands and knees that I looked up and saw my Preye seating in the front row, in the blazer and tie of an SS3 student.  And there on my hands and knees I saw my entire life flash before my eyes and pause at the part where he’d mentioned that his mother was a very high ranking police officer and his father a politician.

Epilogue: So right now I’m in hiding.  I hear Preye’s mom has been to the zonal office and they are calling for my head.  Next step, I know, is that they’ll call Daddy as my next of kin when they can’t find me.  So the question I stay up late every night pondering is…who send me message???

OK, lessons learned – Writing a long story is NOT EASY! I give it up for all those writers who can carry a series for weeks, you guys are geniuses.

Photo credit: Google images


41 responses »

  1. Hehehehehehehehehehe!!!!!

    Who send you message?!! Priye don use corfer shine! Badt guy!!!!!!

    ‘Porn star material ko, WAEC material ni’!!!

    Nice one. You tell a good story.

  2. LMAO!!! Oh boy eh!!! See as ya life take end! I have not been able to stop laughing…..darn it Lizzy, you sure can write! Nice one

  3. laugh my African behind off kwakwaaakwakwa. Yep your life indeed has reached it’s end. Demonstration comes to mind. Thumbs up babe.

  4. Pingback: The Day My Life Ended | zeenike

    • Do you know!!! I wrote it based on the horror story they told us when we reported for Service in Bayelsa, about a girl corper that the same thing happened to. I couldn’t imagine how a woman in her right mind would let that happen so I decided to find an excuse for her.
      Thank you so much for coming, I’m honoured to have you!

    • You know, I keep myself up at night sometimes wondering what I would do in that situation. Chei, may God not allow us see bad thing!
      Thanks for coming.

    • Mehn, it’s based on a true life story, oh. A female corper in the set before mine in Bayelsa actually got pregnant for her student. Where will someone keep her face when something like that happens, eh? It sends shivers down the spine!
      Thanks for reading and I absolutely love your blog!

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